Coach Seattle

In the last four days, I have been working with three peers to get a presentation ready for a meeting.

We haven’t worked closely before. In addition to our regular job duties, we worked extra hours; taking turns to contribute to the slides. We naturally came together as a team because we shared the same vision. We wanted to create a win-win for our company and customers by leading a conversation on the industry trend, market needs and calling for actions. We worked in an open space where the new ideas and different perspectives flow freely. That leads to positive energy, innovation and productivity. We ended up creating a great presentation.

I haven’t worked in such a space for a long time and truly enjoyed it. I think this could be every leader’s dream team. Could a leader build such a team strategically? Or does a team have to get “right” members to work together?

It seems there is always a team spirit. We either fit in or we don’t. When we do, we are energized. When we don’t and we settle, work is not an enjoyable experience any more.

I attended a speech by Marilyn Carlson Nelson today. She talked about “How We Lead Matters” She said “You can’t compartmentalize your leadership into choices you make in your personal life and your choices in your professional life. It undermines your credibility. You need to be consistently to be who you are. A leader is a leader.”

I love her definition of leadership - taking complete responsibility and changing it for better. She said opportunities to lead and to make a different represent themselves all the time. When they do, we act on them. That spoke to my mind. My mission as a leadership coach is to inspire people to act on the opportunities to lead and to make a difference.

By the end of the speech, she asked us to do an exercise - at the end of every day, ask ourselves “Is today a day I would sign my name as an artist proudly sign to her painting?” I can relate to the significance of the exercise. With the death of my brother 30 yr ago, I don't count my days as if they are endless.

I was deeply touched by her leadership. I felt energized the whole day by her speech.

It’s an exciting day. My 80 year old father passed the citizen test today and will be sworn in next Monday. I helped him to study US history and government for the last two months. Sometimes he was clear and sometimes he got confused between the words. When he was confused, he looked at my seventy eight year old mom who passed the test two years ago. She would say a couple of key words and suddenly he got clear. There are ninety six questions to prepare for US government and history. I didn’t know some of the answers until I helped him to prepare the test. I am glad he passed. He has been recovering from colon cancer and was in and out of the hospital in the last two years. He is undefeatable. We are an American family now.

 

I am watching Present Obama taking oath and giving his speech. This is an exciting moment. People are eager for a change. President Obama calls everyone’s actions to change with the changing world and find meaning greater than us. He says among all of the new things, our values don’t change. His message touches me.

Leaders might believe that they have a good team since team members get along and work together. They get their job done.

 

I used to listen to leaders’ experience of their team and coach them from their experience. Now, I often ask leaders to look deeper. What gives the team positive energy? Does that same thing give you positive energy too? What messages are you receiving from the team? How accurate are the messages? What kind of things triggers the team to react?  What kind of things the team care to know? or not know? Why?

 

The more observant a leader is, the more he can grow his team.

 

HsuanHua Chang

It’s 2009. This is the year that requires people having a whole new mind. Business model and life style need to be changed to adapt the economy. This is the year that requires new leadership to take care of the tangible and the intangible so people will follow and work together. This is the year the world will work together to prevent economy from collapsing. It’s a significant year. We are all facing challenges and will all be OK by the end of the year.

 

I was in the ICF (International Coach Federation) Annual Conference last week. There were over 1500 coaches from 40+ countries attended the conference. The opening session started with a song "when you were born, you cried and world rejoiced, live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice.” I was singing along and my tears started to drop. This song touched my heart. As a passionate and effective coach, I am committed to be at service and make a difference to the world. I am sure there will be a lot of people cry when I die and I will leave legacy behind.

 

I am into marketing and selling nowdays. Watching the election in the last few months from that perspective, I had my learning.

 

From selling point of view, we can't sell people what we can offer. We sell them what they need. People need a change and Obama has been marketing himself to meet the needs. That created a huge suppor group and favorable votes. He used technology extremely well on marketing and that certainly helped to close the deal.

It provided a learning for me on how to market myself as a leadership coach and how to support my clients to market and sell their ideas to their organizations or other organizations. After all, leadership is to sense the needs of people/organization and build a team to meet the needs with inspiration, engagement and execution!

 

Cheers to the change!

 

HsuanHua Chang, www.coachseattle.com

Today is Blog Action Day and this year's goal is to start a global conversation on poverty.

 

Coming from a developing country, I grew up in a very simple life style. In grade school, our lunch left over was sent to feed the pigs that were raised by the teachers in school ground. When the pigs grew up, they became our lunch. We learned not to waste food. We didn’t have hot water tank. We cooked water for hot water when needed. We were used to using cold water.

 

If you ever go to Costco when it closes, you will see all of the left over from the food  stand was dumped as trash. And I heard that it’s common practice in all restaurants. When I am in the gym, I see people stay in the shower for a long time and take hot water for granted.

 

I don’t really know how to start a poverty conversation in this environment.

 

A month ago, I donated my leadership coaching gift certificates for United Way auction at work.  My peer in charge rejected them and told me that my agenda was not in the spirit of the United Way. I didn’t know what she was talking about. I found another peer in charge to accept my gifts and raised more than $500 for the poor. I do what I can do in this environment where I don’t know how to start a poverty conversation.

 

"Making sure someone achieves certain performance levels is managing. Helping them handle problems for themselves is coaching." (from Coaching：The Ten Killer Myths from Harvard Management)

A leader is someone who is able to coach his people so that they are inspired  to be their best and to do what they can do.  A leader is someone who has vision and sees the power of team work. A leader is someone who creates new leader in his team so he can leave and the team stays strong. A leader is someone who sees himself being at service instead of being in control.

A manager is someone who focuses the delivery of his team and doesn't see the value of support ing other teams. A manager is someone who guards his leadership and maintains his control. A manager is someone who manages his team instead of leveraging his team's wisdom and power.

A manager can be transformed to be a leader if he has a boss who is a leader. Or he hires a good leadership coach. A trained leadership coach can support one to develop his leadership skills and competencies.

"The Extraordinary Leader - Turning Good Managers into Great Leaders" by John H Zenger and Joseph Folkman is a good book to read for leaders and managers!

And I am an excellent leadership coach available for you to hire! Email me at hh@coachseattle.com.

13 of us got together in San Francisco last Sat. It’s been over 25+ years since we said goodbye to each other in college graduation in Taipei. We searched for the young men and women we knew behind the wrinkles and grey hairs. We connected right away since we were so close in the college. At the time, 50 of us shared more than 20 hours per week on the common courses. When we were not studying, we had camping trips, dance parties, various parties between various small groups and an awesome week-long graduation trip. Everyone had some different memories and we all agreed that those were wonderful years.

 

After graduation, we all went on different journeys. Half of us became US citizens after getting our master degree and first job here. Would we imagine that when we started the college at the age of 18? At the time, I remember we talked a lot of our dreams and our relationships. We never discussed what kind of life we would be leading when we grew up.

 

It's such a  pleasure to see everyone being healthy and happy. I wish everyone moves into older ages with grace and health. When I see you again, I will give each of you a big hug and tell you I love you!

Professor Randy Pausch passed away with the Last Lecture impact to the world. He said “I often see life is a game. It’s all depends how you choose to play it”. At the age of 47, being a dad of 3 young children, he chose to have fun with the days left when doctor said he only had a short time to live.

 

We often live life as if life is not going to end. We complain we can’t lose weight when we don’t want to exercise more and eat less.  We don’t enjoy our work and don’t want to find another one. We are not satisfied with our relationships and don’t feel like create something new. We love our children and we don’t have time to get into their world. We want to wait until retirement to do things we love to do.  We want to live safely and envy the ones who live life freely.  What if we know we only have 3 months left to live? Will we live life differently? Why won’t we live life as if we don’t have much time left? Now, what’s the first thing you want to do differently?

I went to my friend Alan’s birthday party yesterday. He called it “Celebration for Life” party. Most of his family and friends got together in this beautify place "The Canal" next to Ballard Locks near Seattle. Locks provide a link for boats between the saltwater of the Puget Sound and the fresh water of the  Lake Union and Lake Washington. We tasted great wine and delicious south sea food while chatting, watching the boats passing by in sunset and watching beautiful south-sea dance. Alan just came back from South Sea and loved there. Then, we took turn to share stories about Alan, who usually had walls around him; yet a kind and generous gentleman. While teasing him, we laughed with tears in our eyes. Alan passed away on April 30^th  at the age of 59. We really wished he was there to share the moments with us. I wished I had talked to him more often than I did.  “Celebration of Life” reminded me to be alive, be present with the power of now and enjoy life while my family and friends are around. It also reminded me the tenderness shining through the walls of Alan while we were together. Alan will always be a dear friend.

Last year, I had a profound coaching experience as a client. My coach asked me what I wanted to do and I hadn’t done yet. I named a few coaching business related tasks and then, I shared that I wanted to sell my house and moved closer to my parents’. My dad was recovering from cancer treatment and thought I lived too far for him to visit. My coach reflected back to me – “sounds like you have a lot of passion towards your coaching business. And I also wonder how important it was for you to move since you showed very little energy about it.” I was shocked to hear the reflection. She was right. I didn’t believe that I could organize enough to show my house for sale. I didn’t mean what I said about moving. After the shock, I decided to honor my words. I got my action together and put my house on the market. Three months later, I sold my house and moved closer to my parents. I did what I needed to do to make it happen even there was a lot of work. I am glad I had the coach!

Three years ago, I took an Emotional Intelligence Test (EQ In Action Profile). I was so impressed by what I learned; I went through the training to become an EQ Profile consultant. Since then, I have given many tests and debrief sessions. At the same time, I have been very intentionally developing my own emotional intelligence. I felt I was making good progress by the results showing in my life. I became a stronger leader and had more balance and fun in life.

 

Yesterday, I retook the test and the data supported my observation of my growth. I am pleased by the result. There are some areas I can use more balance. I was not aware of it. I will keep an eye on those areas now. This test is a great tool to raise self-awareness.  I felt fortunate that I was introduced to the test and I could jump in the learning immediately. It’s an awesome journey. I will continue to use it to develop my clients and myselff. I am also learning how to introduce this test to others so they are willing to take it on and benefit from it.

It’s 6:40am. I was in my pajamas.  I planned to do 10-minute emailing, 10-minute biking, 10-minute walking with the dogs, 20-miniute personal grooming and start a conference call at 7:30.

 

My 16-yr old suddenly asked  “Mom, could you take me to school?” I replied harshly “no, you didn’t give me enough notice” She said “cool off, I was just asking”. Her reply made me reflect the whole thing.. Yes. She was just making a request, where was my freedom to reject the request with grace?

 

I realize that I had anxiety over saying NO to my children when I could have accepted their requests.

 

When I don’t have time to accommodate them, I can say no easily. When I really want to accommodate them and I can do it by stretching myself, I have  hard time to say NO. I often stretch myself  to accommodate or I say NO with anger. Anger was more towards me for not wanting to accommodate. How interesting it came out so negative  towards them when I was upset with myself.

 

What I want to practice is to say NO gently and lovingly to my children when I choose not to accommodate them.

I got a hammock and shared the news with a friend happily “I always wanted one”. She asked "Where do you put it?” I replied quickly “My patio”. She said with a sorry voice “You have no privacy, then”.  

 

Guess what? When I lay on the hammock, I feel like I am on the beach. I can see the sky and feel the breeze. Do I care about privacy on the beach? :)

 

My friend has a subjective truth - when you lay on the hammock, you need privacy. She projected her subjective truth to me as THE truth (objective truth) without thinking if that’s true for me.

 

How many times in our life did we project our subjective truth to others and expected them to see it as THE truth? We probably told our kids many truths we believed and they found out it’s not THE truth when they grow older. For example, we probably told them “if I can do it, you can do it" without thinking it could be not true.

 

Only when we can differentiate between a subjective truth and an objective truth, we can have clarity.

Life with clarity is a good one!

Leaders with clarity are the ones who can inpsire their people to do extraordinary things!

 

In “Clear Leadership”, Gervase R. Bushe shared four leadership skills. 1. Aware Self – the ability of observing and knowing one’s own experience; 2. Descriptive Self – the ability to describe one’s own experience so that others empathize with it; 3. Curious Self – the ability of getting others to describe their experience; 4. Appreciate Self – the ability to find the best in people and processes. A person who has these four skills can provide leadership when they do something that helps a group or organization to achieve its goals or increase its effectiveness.

 

Interesting enough, I have seen those four skills as the key skills for an effective coach.  I have been very intentionally working on mastering them. I can listen and hear my clients only when I master self awareness. I can understand my client’s experience only when I master the skill of reframing and curiosity with clarity. I can coach my clients to tab into their potential and eliminate interferences only when I master self awareness and  appreciative creativity and conversations.

 

Being an effective coach is like being an effective leader. My leadership coaching training has made me to be a stronger leader. It’s really interesting to see the relatedness between the two.

In the book of “It’s Not About The Coffee”, Starbucks Former President Howard Behar said “If you grow people, the people grow the business” He said “We are in the people business serving coffee, not the coffee business serving people”. So he built a people-centered organization.

 

Sometimes, when I talked corporation politics with my peers, I doubted if my leadership coaching philosophy would work in a big organization. When leaders are occupied by performance, people are often missed. “People come first” is my philosophy.

 

When I read this book and know there is a successful leader who shares the same philosophy of mine, I feel relieved and hopeful for my work. His ten principles of Personal Leadership are worth to read and reflect. I love the last one especially – Dare to dream! He said “Big dreams mean big goals, big hopes, big joys. Say yes, and enjoy all that you are doing, and help others to do the same.”

 

While I was in a leadership coaching training last year, a homework was given to ask us to choose a new physical activity. I chose swimming, even though I had always been afraid of the water. I had learned to do the backstroke years ago and I still didn't feel safe in the water. I wanted to be able to enjoy the water.

 

I checked out the pool in my gym. It was 4-feet deep over the entire length. I could stand up anytime. Rather than using chlorine, the pool used salt so I wouldn't get chlorine damage to my hair or skin. It's a perfect pool for me. When I started to practice, it was still quite a struggle. Emotionally, it took time to trust that I would be ok in the water. I kept going and it started to get easier and easier. After 5 months, I finally learned to relax in the water and was able to float. While floating, I feel like I am being hugged by the water. That's a wonderful feeling. I feel my body and the water become one.

Through this homework, I realized that when I let go of fear, I experienced freedom and joy. I learned that no one could have helped me to let go of fear. I had to be ready to do that. And there was no easy way to let go of fear. It took courage and persistence to get through it.

What fear in your life do you want to manage? Could it be a decision about a relationship? Could it be a conversation that needs to happen? A request?  An adventure? A truth to see? A truth to tell? Are you ready to do it?

We are living in a changing world. How to adapt changes is an important skill to learn.

Changes create a lot of stress. People react emotionally when under stress. If they have a constructive outlet for their emotions, they can be guided and learned from the experience.

 

In an organization, if leaders prepare their teams before a change happens, the stress can be reduced.  When people understand a change, they tend to see the possibility from the change and take it more positively.

 

When a change happens because of cutting cost, leaders need to be honest about it instead of sugar-coding it. This will build trust and set the model of taking accountability. Therefore, introducing changes is an art.

 

“The Change Cycle” written by Brock and Salerno teaches readers about six predictable and sequential stages. This model helps people understand what they out to expect, from themselves and others, as they move through each stage of the Chang Cycle.

When people decide to leave a relationship, they often say “we grew apart”.

It started to make more sense to me when I studied Stages of Development. Some people grow through different experiences and they move up to a later developmental stage every few years. Some people don’t have the capacity to learn and grow after certain stage. They stay in the same development stage for years. Growing apart becomes a natural process for many relationships.

 

When two organizations get merged, there are always conflicts because people are forced into working relationships without much training. Organizations have their own stage of development based on their leaders’ development stages. When merge happens, people need to learn to work together and it takes time and intentional effort. Leaders who can facilitate the learning usually can make the merge less painful. Leaders who can’t even grasp what’s happening would suffer with his/her team. Leadership coach can play an important role during this difficult time.